The War on Poetry
Every day I am faced with horrors.
As a coastal elite with a BFA in Art History and a fondness for classic literature, I thought the state of poetry couldn’t get any worse. But then I found out Megan Fox is publishing a book of poems.
things that happened in pop culture you should know about:
Kim posted a photo of herself getting a very expensive MRI-type scan that is so clearly FaceTuned that it’s hard to look at.
New Olivia feels like it was written for a 90s teen movie (a compliment). The music video was shot by my queen Petra Collins.
Kamala + Husband went to Beyonce in DC! There was a storm delay, so Bey paid the DC metro over $100k to keep operations running later than usual.
Eras Tour US Leg #1 ended. Karlie was there. 1989 TV was announced.
RE: Taylor. UK Prime Minister Rishi Sunak went to a Taylor-themed Soulcycle class in LA. Taste. Don’t get any ideas, Joe. It’s dangerous in there.
Katy Perry stole another house from the elderly. And! It turns out that the older man who owns the house is ex-RHOD housewife Kameron Westcott’s father-in-law.
Andrew Garfield is vacationing with his friends in Italy.
Lorde is back in the studio and played two demos at a recent Eastern European show. 1989 TV collab? Hunger Games song?
Paul Mescal and Harry Styles hung out (INTERESTING). Then Paul Mescal was spotted with Daisy Edgar-Jones (🥲). And then, Paul was spotted with Phoebe Waller-Bridge (a little too close to my feebs, if you ask me). This is funny because if you remember the chart, we’re making some interesting triangles!
Harry Styles recently followed Taylor on IG…interesting.
RE: New Taylor. Harry Styles is dating Taylor Russell.
Selena Gomez and Francia Raisa (kidney donator) are friends again.
UPS won their union battle and will now average out at a salary of 170k. American Heroes.
RE: Unions. Bethenny Frankel wants reality stars to unionize, which, like, sure. I guess.
Bravo Bravo Bravo. THIS IS HILARIOUS. RHOSLC trailer. This is desperate.
Briana Chickenfry is dating Zach Bryan.
Dave bought back Barstool from Penn for $1.
This is old but in Boston, a cop went down a slide and came out of it like he was being shot out of a cannon, and it turns out it’s just a normal slide. I’m still laughing about it.
Something is going on with Bella Hadid.
Zuck has called off the fight against Elon.
Alex Cooper signed Madeline Argy and Alix Earle to her new media company. It will be interesting to see how Alix’s TikTok schtick translates to a podcast. A lot of her appeal comes from how personal the GRWM videos are.
Tory Lanez is going to jail for ten years for shooting Megan Thee Stallion. He still claims he’s innocent. Drake liked his IG post about it.
THE ALABAMA BRAWL. YALL. OMG. I love the cinema.
Trump is back with some zingers. His confidence right now… I’m trying not to freak out yet, but.
things I’m watching:
Below Deck Australia. WOWWWW. This season. Heartbreaking. Amazing. Aesha is the Chief Stew we have ever seen (sorry Daisy). I can’t imagine it was an easy decision to show Luke and Laura’s behavior, but the crew and production handled it so well that it makes me feel like the crew’s safety is everyone’s number one priority. I don’t like that Bravo is doing two episodes a week, it’s weird?
The Bear. I put off watching as long as possible, but surprisingly, I loved it. But I have a few notes.
Does this really take place in Chicago? Why does it feel like Boston? Are Boston and Chicago that similar? I have a lot of questions.
How old is everyone? Cousin says he’s 45 in his stage episode, but there’s no way Michael was that much older than Chef? How old is Chef? I would have guessed like mid-30s. But Clare is the same age? And she’s still in her residency? But she was in med school five years ago? And Chef was already at Noma…I need to see a timeline.
Clare isn’t busy enough to be a doctor. She should be doing 18-hour shifts and sleeping all the time. She doesn’t have time for a drive to the middle of nowhere Chicago and then day parties that turn into all-nighters. Maybe I just don’t think I like her.
things I’m reading
Remarkably Bright Creatures (Audiobook). I’m enjoying this book way more than I expected. I love the flow of the story and that the chapters are broken up into different narrators, especially from the octopus’ pov. The voice of the octopus is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life. It’s got me giggling and giggling.
Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes (Prequel). I wouldn’t say it was Hunger Games good, but it was nostalgic and fun to be back in that world. I’m cautious about mentioning it because I simply do not have the bandwidth for my TikTok feed to be all Gen Z analysis of this book.
things I like:
I have a new morning routine. I bought a radio alarm clock, moved my phone charger out of my bedroom, doing morning ice facials (the closest thing I can get to an ice bath), and sending all my friends my NYT daily puzzles scores.
I need to know where I can get the Diet Coke Vanilla with Extra Caffeine, and I need to know where I can get it NOW.
My pebble ice machine.
New RHONY. So good.
Oppenheimer. I still can't stop thinking about it. I want to see it again.
The last 5 months of the year!!! August is the new year. Everything feels better in August!
things I hate:
Recording people in public and posting it. We need to grow out of this.
Elon disabling embedded tweets has taken a lot of joy out of TIL for me. I miss when the tweets looked aesthetic in my emails.
What is going on with planes? Why are there so many delays now? I’m so confused.
Look at us, back on a schedule. We love to see it.
TIL is what I like! I jump up and down when I see a new edition in my inbox ;)